Reply, attribute my best guy friend is dating someone amusing idea
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And that someone might just be your best friend, the person who has been there all along. Whether or not you have already thought of them in a romantic way, it is worth considering whether there is more to your relationship than you originally thought. Your hugs linger, you find yourself playing with your hair when you talk to them, and you regularly break the touch barrier. And on top of that, you often find yourselves bantering or teasing each other in a flirtatious manner. If you find yourselves agreeing about these issues - especially the dating-related ones, then you are probably a good match! They are the first person you want to talk to about anything, and you both insist on keeping in constant contact when you are apart.
Be honest with yourself: Are you on the fence some of the time, unsure if you want to move your friend chemistry into a full-blown relationship? If so, he can tell. Jeff, a year-old ad agency owner, instantly hit it off with a female co-worker, who he was interested in pursuing after he moved on to a new job. Jeff says he still talks to his friend and crush, and they even hung out recently. But with her, I don't know. It's like I've built it up because we've been friends for so long.
In my mind, the person is obviously going to tell everyone. That fear is so real. If two people that are friends decide to date and it doesn't work out, it always makes things weird. And, of course, there's always the chance that he digs you as a friend and nothing more. There's nothing wrong with that-especially since you might actually feel the same way.
But if you're feeling it with a friend, it's worth thinking about making a move. She also admitted while looking for a job she was so stressed she could not sleep.
Which makes me worried she is not thinking straight. She also puts way too much stock in instant connections. She is an it religious and believe they are signs from God.
When in reality it was probably some dude who is good at smooth talking. The other problem is I know who this guy is and he is an alcoholic, drug using jerk but since she is in the honeymoon stage right now she does not know this. I also know they have very different views on topics such as sex.
She is no sex till marriage and he is he wants some as soon possible. She also hid him from me till she decided to date him. I took it poorly, and got emotional cause she picked s guy she barely knew over the guy who has been with her through thick and thin. We are not talking right now. She never replied so I think she is upset with me.
It still really hurts. I am not sure how I should handle this. I know right now they are still in the honeymoon phase but I am hoping it does not last too long, I am truthfully worried she only mainly did this due to her current depression and that instant connection thing. I do think walking away and not talking is good to get my head straight for now.
Delete Report Edit Lock Reported. Respond to Anonymous:.
17 Things That Happen When Your Best Friend Starts Dating Someone New. to somewhat resent the guy or girl that they're now dating. like they're slowly taking your best friend away from you. Jun 19, The guy he saw was not my boyfriend, but he was a guy friend I thought might be into me. If total strangers and friends think you guys are giving off couple vibes, it's because he's absolutely Occupation: Sex & Relationships Editor. Does the guy know? Have you told him? Try telling him. See whom he feels for because at the end of the day that also matters. Why ruin your relationship by telling to your girl-friend first and playing with the probability of losing both of them.
Respond Your response must be between 3 and characters. You're in denial.
Jun 20, 1. He's still heating up. If you only see your guy friend sporadically, you might not be on his relationship radar just yet. The attraction he feels is more of a slow-burn instead of fireworks. My $ is that even though she is your best friend, the fact that she "friend-zoned" you so easily is the classic "girls choose jerks over nice guys" stereotype. Just a word of advice on dating your best friend: It can be next to impossible to go back to the way you used to be if dating them doesn't work out. However, knowing that you'll be dating someone whom you trust wholeheartedly can certainly make it seem like a worthy endeavor despite the risks.
That means you are refusing to see the facts becasue you know what they mean and you o not want to believe them, you do not want then to be true.
First, you're known her 8 years. In all that time you never stepped up to the plate and told her what you feel. You once "accidentally ". She was telling you she wasn't interested in you but you wanted to believe it was the distance. When she finally DID arrive in country, for a short distance relationship you were unable to make any solid plans with her.
If she was interested, she would have made time. She met and went home with a guy she barely knew due to instant connection. There you go.
17 Things That Happen When Your Best Friend Starts Dating Someone New
She can feel and she will react WHEN it's there. It's not there with you. Now you're her father, claiming he's bad for her, a drunk, a druggie, all in all a horrible guy EXCEPT he has her attention. You're grasping at straws, hoping they're as incompatible as you want them to be but the news flash here is She's just having a fling.
5 SIGNS YOUR BEST GUY FRIEND HAS A CRUSH ON YOU!
She's not involved with some guy who's bad for her Only you are thinking this is a relationship she's trying to form with him. She met him on NYE, for Christ's sake, it's fling. Bottom line Why are you surprised that you're being treated as a friend when friendship is what you use to keep this one sided connection going?
When you didn't declare her yours 8 years ago, you set yourself up to be her friend. She does not see you as a long term guy. She's not sexually interested.
What to do? Move on and find someone who cares about you. You've wasted too much time trying to win this woman over with your friendship and now you're wondering why she treats you like a friend. Let her go. Find someone who cares for you. Delete Report Edit Reported Reply. Like I said she takes instant connections way too seriously. She is a bit religious and she straight up told she thought it was a sign. She is also a no sex till marriage kind of girl so she was not at his place sleeping with him.
They have been mainly just hanging out at the bar.
Michael Send a private message. I don't believe anyone man or woman has very much patience with emotional overload.
Its up to you if the trouble is worth it. Personally i say walk away save your self the heartache. It never ends well to involve your self in other peoples relationships. IF you are to do anything i would say drop her a message saying something quick and simple. If she is making bad decisions then they are hers to make you cant really stop her without making things worse. Give her some space to come to you if things get hairy.
Michael : Trust me when I say I do think she is worth it but I could be saying that to myself and I'm actually a glutton for punishment and not realize it. Yeah I was not planning to try breaking them up. Cause I get trying to break them up makes me look bad and well I don't think she will believe me right now anyway with the honeymoon phase going on.
I do have some horrible stories of him acting like a massive jerk but I promised the person whose stories were about not to involve them and I agreed. I truthfully don't blame the person for not wanting to be involved.
Sigh wish there was a way to help her realize that but yeah right now I feel there isn't. I think I need the space like you suggested cause I am really not handling this well. It is affecting me physically. Can't eat, can barely sleep, puking, etc are being caused by this. Oh nothing like unrequited love You are her friend for 8 years really not even friends on your side because you have feelings for her. You need to move on and find someone who is into you Can't be said any clearer friend.
We're not trying to harm you here, we are trying to help you to help yourself. Zombie Send a private message. Let her go dude. You missed your chance with her a long time ago, and she doesn't sound like that great a partner alcoholic, severe depression.
May 09, When you've re-downloaded every new dating app only to swear off romance for the rest of your life two hours later, dating a trusted friend can feel like a great option. They're cute, they're nice. Apr 24, Not only are you dealing with the fact that someone else is dating the person you like, but that someone is your best friend. There's a lot of layers to that kind of pain, and it's not. Jul 28, *About a year ago, I moved back to my hometown from a couple years living far away. When I got back this guy that I had been pretty good friends with before expressed interest in mariechloepujol.com: John Ortved.
You can do better and it's not healthy to dwell on her. Anonymous : It doesn't change anything. She's got a drinking problem and untreated mental health issues. Attaching yourself to her will only make your own issues worse. Think about it, you're depressed. Do you really need the knowledge that your GF is an alcoholic added to the list of things that can bring you down or cause you to worry?
You can't save her and like someone drowning she'll drag you down with her. Being with her if she is even interested in that isn't going to make you happy in the long run. The idealized notion of her that you have won't last in the harsh light of the real world. Zombie : Dude I am not on meds for my issues if that is what you mean by untreated.
So I fail to see how that is a problem. I stopped the meds as I found they made my problems worse and have been dealing with day by day. She was doing great till she moved back. I think the stress of that and looking for a job got to her.
I think she will get better but she needs to be free of some bad influences some of her friends were who got her into drinking and were buying her drinks. Probably more then she needed. And hell I grew up with a sister with bipolar I know how mental illness is and how to handle it. Edited on February 2, at UTC by the author. Anonymous : "Dude I am not on meds for my issues if that is what you mean by untreated" I was talking about her issues being untreated not yours.
If you took offense that wasn't my intent. My point is and was that, her problems will make your problems worse, not better.
Zombie : Dude I take mental health issues seriously. Like I said grew up with a sister with bipolar and I know how bad it can affect someone. Trust me when I say what she is going through is nothing compared to what my sister was like 10 years ago.
My best guy friend is dating someone
I get she has mental health issues and I have known for years. So do I before this stuff happened we were helping each other out with it when she she was in Texas. I get the stress of the move and and job search and having no way to contact people like me probably is what is causing this.
I get massive anxiety attacks from the old job I just quit so I could focus on school. Been there done that and I can tell you that my feeling is that it will not proceed any further then friends, if even that is salvage.
Can't wish upon rainbows, man. If she wanted it to happen, it would be happening.
Her excuse was just that, a way to let you down easy, it was not as the movie quote goes code for, "try harder". Flip it and think about how you would let down a women friend that you had no interest in. Hurts, but you have to accept that, go through whatever you have to, and move on. There will be other loves in your life.
I would tell her I am not interested. She never did that. She did the above. Anonymous : I was making a point as to how people let others down, not the exact wording.