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First dates are stressful. Even if they go well, meeting a new person is inherently going to be difficult at first. And while we all inevitably have a rotten date or two under our belts, some dates take it from bad to horrific. We've rounded up the craziest stories from various threads that will make you want to thank your lucky stars your last date was just a bad kisser. Until two days ago when I saw her in the pub where we had a brief catch-up and I got her number. We meet up and it was going great.

I found out about it because I made some sort of inappropriate joke, and he followed up his laugh with, 'You're about to lose a bunch of people in my office a bunch of money. I went into the bathroom, called my roommate, and had her come get me. Haven't online-dated since.

Before telling me-during sex-that he had a girlfriend. And then when I kicked him out, he asked me for my Wi-Fi password so he could get an Uber. I see him waiting outside and attempt to quicken my pace no one wants to awkwardly make eye contact for an entire block -all the while trying to strut my stuff, of course.

About halfway to him, I just Broken shoe and everything.

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What a time to be alive. At SELF, Lindsey has specialized in culture, love, and sex, but also written about health, food, fitness, and beauty. Read more. SELF does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Any information published on this website or by this brand is not intended as a substitute for medical advice, and you should not take any action before consulting with a healthcare professional.

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He proceeded to get high and then streaked around his backyard. I went home and never spoke to him again.

He originally said he worked on Wall Street, but was actually a 'work-from-home consultant,' which I learned meant he was unemployed. Then he went on about how he was addicted to artificial sweeteners and ordered them online all the time. He also said he likes to cook, so I asked him what he makes and he said, 'Anything I can use sweeteners in, like fruit soup. The guy sitting next to us was laughing so hard his back was shaking.

While we perused the menu at an Indian restaurant, some winged beast flew overhead and took the most massive dump on me. There was bird poo in my hair, all over my face, and down the front of my body. As I stood there, shocked and embarrassed, I turned to see my date nearly having a stroke to hold his laughter in.

Things didn't work out. He and I have always gotten along and he seemed cool, so I figured, why not? We met up at a nice restaurant and the evening was going so well when he told me that he'd bought us tickets to see a movie - 50 Shades of Grey.

I don't think it would have been THAT awkward if it weren't for his intense hand-squeezing during the sex scenes of the film. When I arrived, he asked for a ride to Ikea because he'd just sold his dining room table on Craigslist and needed another.

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I found out then that he didn't have a car. So I drove him, and when we got back to his place, I watched TV with his roommate's girlfriend while he made dinner.

Afterward, he asked if I wanted to stay the night because he had a job interview in the morning that he needed a ride to. I hightailed it out of there. I have no idea why I stayed as long as I did. He picked me up and took me to the house he was renting with some other guys, and we went directly to his room where he had a card table set up in front of his TV. He turned on South Park and brought in burnt, flaky grilled cheese sandwiches and a bag of tortilla chips, and we had the worst conversation.

Then we sat on his bed and he repeatedly kept trying to touch my butt. I only lasted two episodes before I told him to take me home. During my turn I heard him snickering behind me, saying, 'I'm definitely an ass man.

Then we sat down to watch a movie and he leaned in close, saying, 'hold me,' in a baby voice. I shot up off the couch and said I needed to go and he had to drive me home.

I flew out of the apartment, forgetting that there were stairs.

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Just simple things like food, postcards and books, which was a nice idea but it seemed a little excessive. Office got extremely quiet, which is unsettling to begin with, and I had my office door closed. Watched our room to make sure no one was messing with me. It was just weird. One time I went in about 2 am and noticed and elderly gentlemen asleep on one of the mobility scooters at the entrance. When I left bout 20 minutes later, he was still there. I thought it was a little odd no one from the store had woken him up, but whatever.

Found out the next day he had died and spent the better part of a day on display as a corpse at the entrance to walmart.

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So I decided, as I occasionally did, to skip out on my last two classes and head home. That meant no school buses obviously so I would just walk the 3 miles home. Before the age of computer cell phones this was a pretty long, boring hike to take so I decided to take a short cut through some small wooded trail along the creek. Eventually I came across a dead cat lying in the middle of the trail.

As I walked around it I noticed another dead cat to my left. Looked to my right and sure enough there was another. Creeped out, I looked behind me and noticed two more, and yet another two in front of me. Almost like a half assed pentagam. I speeded up the pace and got the hell out of there. Never took that trail again. Thinking back a really weird thing is that there was no visible damage to any of the cats, to blood or cuts, the dead. That is the day I started drinking heavily.

The 2nd night I had a vivid dream where I saw him lying on his side in a field, dead, with his neck snapped and his tongue hanging out. He looked just as he did in my dream, down to the position of his body and his tongue being out.

We figure he got his neck snapped by a coyote or dog. Creeped me right out and I strongly believe that dreams can tell you things if you only pay attention. RIP sweet Max. During the summer we housed the few summer school students who remained on campus nearly It may be significant to point out these students tended towards the highly academically-motivated, often times high-stress students, if quiet.

One warm day in late June my office received a call from a concerned sibling that she and her family was unable to reach her brother who lived by himself in a room on the summer school floor.

Also - we are to only enter a room with another staff member present to ensure personal safety of staff and students. I failed to reach this student on his room and mobile phone, and was working short-staffed so since I was on my own I decided to pop up to his room and check on him. I arrived on his floor around 2 in the afternoon and the floor seemed deserted as I had expected. I found his room number and immediately noticed the sound of a movie playing on a TV or computer from behind the door.

I knocked three times and announced that I was a staff member checking on his health and safety.

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I checked the floor showers and bathrooms and found them deserted. I returned to his door and knocked three more times, waiting about 20 seconds between each knock. This is when my instincts started to buzz.

I was by myself, so I probably let myself get more worked up than if I was with someone else. A deserted dorm floor, even at 2 in the afternoon, oftentimes evokes Kubrician memories of the Overlook Hotel. I knocked on the door one more time for good measure, again announced myself as the hall director.

I keyed into the room and my spider sense went off even stronger: The room appeared relatively vacant; the student appeared to be living out of a suitcase which is unusual for someone staying no less than 8 weeks for a summer school session. The bedding was tussled like someone had been sleeping in it and all the lights in the room were on. And as I had suspected, there was an open laptop on a desk running on battery power playing The Matrix.

But no student. Then I turned to leave, planning on trying to reach the student later in the afternoon or that night. As I turned to leave I noticed another odd piece of evidence; the accordion closet doors which are removed in most rooms due to disuse, particularly single rooms like his were still in this room.

And they were closed. Then my intuition spiked higher than ever. I realized I was alone in a room with a potentially suicidal student who may, in fact, have completed just that. I felt like I was talking to myself when my voice cracked as I spoke to the closed doors and announced my name and title and that I would be opening those accordion doors in 3 seconds.

I fumbled with the latch on the doors, and finally managed to get them disengaged, and as I slid the doors apart, I was umariechloepujol.comepared. We stared at each other for a good 15 seconds without blinking, breathing or speaking.

I finally realized what was going on and my natural emotion was disbelief. Then a few hours later, security came by to change the locks. I live in the sticks in Michigan, but a decent sized neighborhood with about twenty houses. Our streets make two circles. I was home with my toddler, who was taking a nap.

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Around noon. Which way did it go?! I asked if he needed help, but he declined, saying an ambulance was on its way and just needed to find the cat. Perplexed, I pull off my long sleeve and hand it to the guy, telling him to at least wrap his injury. He holds up his arm, and his fingers are mangled. So I help him look. So do a few of our neighbors. Ambulance arrives a few houses down at his place, so we walk down and sit on the curb.

Suddenly, commotion from the other way and a half dozen people sprinting to the cul-de-sac to corner this animal. It disappears around a house, and we hear a volley of barking. Another man comes from behind the house, running at full speed towards the ambo. Bloody guy said he was weeding his garden and this giant black fuzzy thing with teeth and a tail chomped his hand under the bush and ran. He tried to follow it, but it was too fast.

Got his digits stuck back on properly though, and has since fenced his back yard. During senior year we got senior release during lunch which meant we could leave school during our lunch period. Being horny teens we went back to her house and she started giving me a bj. We both jumped up and got dressed. No one was home.

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Both her parents were at work and her siblings was at school. We looked outside and no neighbors were outside. To this day we have no idea who or what it was, but we both heard it. One late night I was alone in the shop tattooing some eighteen-year-old kid and the light above me started flickering.

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My lights above my station had always been perfectly lit so this seemed unusual. Can you stop messing with my light, please? From that moment I knew the dead shop owner was there and I knew he was just causing occasional mayhem to fuck with us, nothing malicious but definitely haunting that place. Anyways, on this one night all the campers had made their shelters, we had cooked dinner, and were all just sitting around the campfire.

It was getting late, maybeso I sent all the campers to their shelters for the night and started cleaning up the fire. They were pretty faint, but myself and my fellow staffers could definitely hear them. They went on for about 30 minutes, ringing ever 30 seconds, or so.

We were all a little creeped out, as there were no churches or towns within 20 miles of us. After the bells stopped, though, the singing started. It was too faint to hear the words, but it sounded like church choir music, but a lot of people, and a lot more enthusiastic.

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Also, it was almost midnight at this point. All of the campers were super creeped out, but I lied to them, telling them there was a church service going on in camp, and that there was nothing to be scared of. Eventually, at almost 1 AM, the singing stopped.

I was returning to my office having finished a meeting. As I approached the door, I saw my colleague walk from the left of the office to the right - presumably returning to his desk. In my dream, I was in my bed doing something on my laptop. Suddenly I just had a bad feeling something wasnt right. Like I somehow knew something was in my room with me that shouldnt be there. I jump off my bed, and hurry and flip my light on.

I flip it on just in time to see this weird black shadow sphere thing with legs zoom under my bed. I woke up scared and crying, but it felt so real and I just knew whatever I saw was very evil. In the episode this women was in her room, and all of a sudden she felt like something wasnt right. She turned her light switch on just in time to see a weird black shadow sphere thing with legs scurry under her bed. It pretty much looked exactly like the thing I saw in my dream. I flipped the fuck out.

Suddenly the phone in the classroom starts ringing. So, after that heart attack I decide to answer it. Not even a dial tone. So I hope out and go back to my dorm. The next day I have class in that room, so I ask my professor how often people call the classroom phone by mistake.

He looks at me funny and says the phone in that room has been disconnected for years. I let my daughter lead the way and she chose to turn up a path that was far less well trafficked than most of the trails in the area. A white plastic lawn chair tied to a tree by a rope, the seat covered in splatters of days old dried viscous fluid.

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This individual was a harm to themselves and others. I am trying to calm them down, moving through the plan we had when they were overcome by their hallucinations. There is an enormous black crow at the window. Tapping on the glass extremely hard with its beak.

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The bird was just staring at me. It would tap, bringing its head back and slamming its beak into the glass. Then staring.

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Over and over again. That bird sat at my window another four hours, staring and tapping. We ended up leaving early because there was a sketchy truck parked there not in the parking lot and my mom was a little uneasy about it. Later that night, my mom was getting ready for bed and screamed because there was a guy peering through her bedroom window.

Jun 27,   Well, SELF asked to hear your dating app horror stories, and you guys answered. Below are some upsetting, embarrassing, and generally terrible online dating tales SELF readers experienced mariechloepujol.com: Lindsey Lanquist. r/TrueScaryStories: True (hopefully), Scary Stories There's an old town hall near where I grew up. It's a small white building, originally built in the s. True scary dating stories - Register and search over 40 million singles: matches and more. How to get a good man. It is not easy for women to find a good man, and to be honest it is not easy for a man to find a good woman. Men looking for a woman - Women looking for a man.

My dad ran outside but the guy was gone already. His truck was identical to the sketchy truck she had seen at the park. Now I just turn the sound all the way down, before I go to bed. Looked to have something strapped to his shirt under the coat with duct tape. He left, I messaged my wife about how creepy he was and that I thought he had a bomb on his chest.

He came back 15 minutes later and thanked me for being polite and started talking about religion and Obama being the Anti-Christ.



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